Amusing Bumper Stickers

"Very funny, Scotty.  Now beam down my clothes."

Friends help you move.  Real friends help you move bodies.

I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.

We are born naked, wet and hungry.  Then things get worse.

Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.

He who laughs last thinks slowest!

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

There's too much blood in my caffeine system.

Hard work has a future payoff.  Laziness pays off now.

I won't rise to the occasion, but I'll slide over to it.

Assassins do it from behind.

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?

I don't suffer from insanity.  I enjoy every minute of it.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

"Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy.

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